This is how I healed.

I took a very deep emotional breath and closed my eyes and laid on my stomach with my head to the most vulnerable side of my neck and then traveled in time. I caught myself in the middle of my mom molesting me and beating me, kicking me out to the streets trying to drown me and putting me in comas and abandoning me and always telling me she hates and she wishes I die. Then getting someone to try and shoot me in the head, in the hallway and treating everyone better than me and looking me in my eyes and telling me that she isn’t my mother because she would never have a loser sun like me me and beat me bloody. I grabbed her hand and I hugged her and told her I love you, I forgive you and thank you.

I found myself with my father and me telling him I forgive you for not having the inner maturity to want to be involved in my Life and I understand that it wasn’t engraved in you because your father left you and honestly I never desires to have a father and I appreciate you for doing your best. I love you, I forgive and thank you.

I found myself with my grandmother and not even blaming her for making me sleep in the cold and telling my cousins to pretend I don’t exist.. I love you, I forgive you and thank you.

I find myself being bullied and beat up by everyone and let down and kicked around, and everyone trying to kill me, stabbing me and trying to shoot me in the head or any part of my body. I love you, I forgive and thank you.

Thank you for destroying me. Thank you for hurting me. Thank you for abandoning me. Thank you for mistreating me. Thank you for making me feel worthless. Thank you for my soul. Thank you for breaking my self image. Thank you for making me sleep in the cold. Thank you for never giving me a home. Thank you for making me sleep anywhere that offered shelter. Thank you for making me lost. Thank you for taking everything away from me that I cared about. Thank you for making me feel all alone. Thank you for making me feel unloved. Thank you for making me feel not good enough. Thank you to everyone for walking away from me when I needed you the most. Thank you for leaving me hungry. Thank you for all the betrayal. Thank you for sending me to prison. Thank you for pretending to care about me. Thank you for kicking me out. Thank you for telling me you would never hurt me and then hurting me. Thank you for not ever giving me stability. Thank for not wanting me. Thank you for telling me I’m not good enough. Thank you for always choosing someone over me. Thank you for putting me last. Thank you for not considering me. Thank you for giving me lost. Thank you for shutting the doors in my face. Thank you for making me feel like I was too complicated to love. Thank you for suppressing me. Thank you for embarrassing me. Thank you for shutting down and not showing your emotions to me. Thank you for not accepting me. Thank you for all the misery. Thank you for all the suffering. I forgive you, I love you and thank you for helping me be the strongest.